Tinfoil Chef

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Not too long ago in what, to us, would be considered a parallel universe. A race of aliens visited the Earth and spent a lot of time studying the planet it’s people and most importantly, the foodstuffs they ate. Finally, they found what they had been searching for: Cheese.

They desperatley needed it because strangely enough, it was an important reactant in their stardrive system and their ship’s systems had been damaged and were no longer able to synthesize this most important fuel component. They were more than a little relieved when their science officer reported that on the planet below there was a more than plentiful supply of many varieties of cheese.

Captain Cheddar, the head cheese, ordered landing parties to explore and locate a cheese for their fuel supply. Mr. Parmigiani, not the cheese, was on the party that discovered that Parmigiano-Reggiano was the ideal match for their cheese fueled stardrive.

The order quickly went out and fuel gathering parties were sent down to collect what would ammount to the entire world’s supply of Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese and refuel the ship as Mr. Parmigiani watches over the process to insure none is missed.

Meanwhile, back on the alter-Earth, cheese lovers everywhere had varying reactions. Some decided that it didn’t matter to them so long as they could still have their Cheddar, Swiss, Monterrey Jack and so on. Others didn’t like that any cheese would be completely unavailable for the years it would take to produce a new supply.

The most militant of these was the group that revered Parmigiano-Reggiano above all cheeses. They mounted first a defensive measure, guarding as many supplies of their beloved cheese as they could. They followed this with an attack that was intended to recover as much of the stolen cheese as possible.

This single battle over a ship needing an emergency refueling eventually escalated into a huge conflict on a galactic scale. The chronicles of which were eventually written in a twelve volume set of books known collectively as “Cheese Wars”, six of which were used as the basis for an immensely popular series of movies.

Technorati Tags: fuel, weird, humor, war, cheese, aliens

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Here’s a chance to use the pie crust recipe I posted recently. Good for any occasion or just for the heck of it. Honestly, you just can’t go wrong with a good lemon pie

Take 2 tablespoons of softened (room temperature) butter and add a cup of sugar and three egg yolks. Mix well and beat until it reaches a light, fluffy mass.

Stir in 3 tablespoons of flour, a half teaspoon of salt, the juice and grated rind of one lemon and a cup and a half of hot milk. Beat the whites of three eggs until they’re stiff and fold them into the mixture.

Fill a 9 inch pie shell with it and bake at 400 degrees for about 40 minutes.

Technorati Tags: recipe, amish, lemon pie, pie, amish lemon sponge, amish pie, lemon

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It’s interesting some of the ways that food is used other than as something to eat. I was looking around at some of them for the heck of it and saw a load of ways in which foods are used as part of a beauty regimen. I can’t honestly say if any of them qualify as the best wrinkle cream but it is interesting just the same to see the extremes that people will go to avoid looking their age.

Here’s just one example of a home made anti-wrinkle treatment that I ran across in my surfing. Note, I make zero claims as to it’s effectiveness since I really don’t know anything about that sort of thing and why this or that works. Although in one case I suspect that the effect is derived from enjoying the silliness of smearing smashed banana all over your face.

Beat the white from one egg, mix in 2 tablespoons of Cucumber juice, a teaspoon of lemon juice, a teaspoon of Rum or Brandy and a teaspoon of Sodium Benzoate

Keep the mixture refrigerated and apply it as needed.

Technorati Tags: recipe, anti-wrinkle cream, beauty treatment, anti wrinkle recipe, wrinkle, beauty aids

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Pies have been a basic staple for desserts for a long time, there’s also the several varieties of meat pies, pot pies and other recipes that require pie crust at some point.

*Note* With most cooking it’s ok to kind of approximate or ‘eyeball’ a lot of ingredient measurements and still have the finished product come out just fine. This is NOT true with baking. Because of the chemistry involved it’s necessary to be as accurate as you can be with ingredient measures. (hmm. I ought to write more about that sometime ‘eh?)

Measure 2 cups of sifted all purpose flour into bowl. Use a fork to mix in 1 teaspoon of salt. Then add two thirds cup of lard OR three fourths cup of shortening and mix it in coarsely.

Sprinkle in ice water one tablespoon at a time, mixing lightly with a fork just until all of the flour is dampened.

Press the dough together firmly into a ball. Use as directed in recipes. This recipe makes enough dough for two 9-inch crusts or a one double crust (top & bottom)

Technorati Tags: dessert, pastry, dough, basic pie crust, pie crust, crust, pie dough, baking, baking

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